I have been thinking about – and missing – my friend Kathy Allen a lot lately. In truth, I think about her, and Fred, every day, but on some days, more than others. I still have blink moments when I think, “We’ll see them for dinner on Saturday, or next time they’re in town, or I’ll call her later and catch up.” And then it settles in. Kathy is gone, Fred is gone, and there is an empty spot that only good memories can fill.
I can’t look in many rooms in our home that don’t hold a reminder of Kathy. Our friendship began in the ’60s when we worked at what at that time, was known as Ma Bell, the telephone office where we were operators. “Operator, number please?” Back when a human voice connected one person with another via a dial-up telephone. Over the years we exchanged gifts. In the kitchen I see holiday trivets I keep up year around, on the patio a tinwork angel, a wooden angel wall hanging in the hall, Christmas ornaments and nativities on China cabinet shelves, tiny books and big books here and there, handmade pot and dish scrubbers in the kitchen, drawers full of handmade scarves, bracelets… These small reminders bring on a smile along with a catch in my throat.
I wrote the poem below sometime ago with Kathy in mind, and posted it on this site long before her passing. I repost it today because I wish for one more walk and chance to talk with my friend. I have so much to tell her, all of which , of course, she may well already know. As a believer, I know there is only a thin veil between this shadowy and insubstantial thing called life, and the people we have known and loved. Kathy loved yellow roses, but what she loved most were the people in her life, Fred, Mark and Marlene, her sisters and their families, her friends. I miss her.
WALK WITH ME
Let us stroll along today and talk.
Tell me what makes you laugh, as we walk.
I want to listen to what you say.
Share your heart with me today.
I want to know what makes you cry.
May I ease your worry, wipe your tears dry?
Share with me your anger deep inside.
I will help you slay that dragon, and turn the tide.
I am your friend come what may.
Please share your heart with me today.
It’s happening in Europe, Australia and Canada. Can it happen here? The idea is that if you have a 
d a year. I’m not kidding, I did. Most of last year I said I was 72. A couple of weeks ago, Bob corrected me (isn’t that what husbands are for?). This is the second time I’ve done this. When I turned 57, I said I was 58, so right up until my 58th birthday, at which point I found out I’d been 57 working toward 58, I was older and younger at the same time. Anyway, the point is in two days I will be 72. I’ve left 71 in the dust, but that’s okay because I never knew I was 71. Now that I’m going to be 72 I’m okay with it, after all I’ve been living with it for a year already.
The lilies were a wonderful surprise, but the biggest surprise was the three – yes THREE – birthday cards that accompanied the plants. I can’t begin to explain those cards except that every one of them contained an inside joke. I laughed so hard my stomach hurt!
Sharon Vander Meer 